It’s okay to be happy. Even now, with the notorious and now heavenly RBG dead and a crucial Supreme Court seat up for grabs, in spite of rising deaths and sinking feelings about what’s-been-going-on, in spite of the suffering brought by climate change, and climate change deniers, even though social media is changing behaviors in hidden ways and democracy seems to be eroding or expanding, it’s hard to tell, even now there are things you can do, experiences you can have, that will spark an inner sense of happiness.
And from there, hope and change are possible. So they say. . .
Welcome to insights from Professor Laurie Santos’ wildly popular course at Yale University called “Psychology and the Good Life.” I haven’t taken it yet, but as a dedicated student of Positive Psychology, I’ve studied the research for years, including an inspiring overview of Santos’ work by Adam Sternbergh called “How To Be Happy.”
“College students are much more overwhelmed, much more stressed, much more anxious, and much more depressed than they’ve ever been,” says Laurie Santos, a master teacher.
Yeah … so who isn’t more stressed, more anxious, more depressed? We are all living through destabilizing, demoralizing times, and the toll it’s taking on our collective well-being is beyond what we can get our tired brains around.
Students are suffering — 52 percent are feeling hopeless, Sternbergh reports, pre-Covid! — and so is America at large, now larger and sicker than ever.
In the last 10 years, the United States has dropped more than 15 places (!!!) in the World Happiness Report issued by the U.N. every year. In a recent one, we’ve sunk to No. 18, well behind Norway (No. 1) and Australia and Sweden (tied for No. 10).
This grim finding was happening before the global pandemic. So why was American’s happiness rating plummeting. . .and what can we do now that COVID has made everything worse?
“Rising inequality, corruption, isolation and distrust” are some of the reasons that U.N. adviser Jeffrey Sachs cites in his analysis of America’s pre-pandemic slide into despair: “Trust in government has plummeted to the lowest level in modern history.”
Unhappiness takes a toll on our collective immune system, which could help explain when America has been so susceptible to the virus.
But that’s only speculation. What we need are facts, strategies, new ways of thinking, and doing. So let’s take a slow nasal breath and a deep dive into some of Santos’ course material and see what we can do in real-time, in practical ways, to rewire our neuroplastic brain to be happier:
ESTABLISH A BASELINE. To begin, ask yourself: How happy am I, right now? One reliable and easy way to determine that, if you dare, is to do what every student who takes Santos’ course must do: Take a free online test called the Authentic Happiness Inventory, courtesy of the University of Pennsylvania’s most positive psychologist, Dr. Martin Seligman. (The Google will happily take you there.)
Don’t judge the number you get. Accept it as your starting point, and know that you can evolve, improve, and prosper over time if you’re willing to change a few behaviors and beliefs. To add some spice to this test-taking, do it with some pals. . .and a bottle of wine.
—WHAT WE THINK WE KNOW IS WRONG. Santos’ course is evidence-based, and there’s plenty of evidence to prove that high achievement and good grades don’t lead to sustained well-being. Neither does more money (after a certain level of comfort), a different home or job, or a long luxurious vacation.
Your mind may be telling you that all these things will make you happier, but your mind is playing tricks on you, Santos explains, citing the work of Sonya Lyubomirsky, the esteemed psychologist and author of “The How of Happiness.” (I hope you’re taking notes.)
WHAT ARE THE TRUE SOURCES OF HAPPINESS? “Happy people devote time to family and friends,” Sternbergh reports, summing up Santos’ research into the habits most consistent in happy people. “They practice gratitude. They practice optimism. They are physically active. They ’savor life’s pleasures and try to live in the present moment,’ as Lyubomirsky puts it.
All of this is revealed by Professor Santos in her course’s second lecture. The remaining 19 lectures are devoted to scientifically tested strategies to actively improve students’ well-being by doing things that rewire their brains.
In her syllabus, Santos calls those behaviors “course re-wirements.” Love it. They include exercising (of course!), keeping a daily gratitude journal, practicing meditation, valuing your time over money, being optimistic, and getting at least seven hours of sleep for three days in a row.
Read that list again. And again. Write it down. Take it to heart. This is exactly what all of us need to be doing right now if we want to ride the waves of the coronavirus pandemic, with joy, and happiness, and grace.
Oh, no! We’re only getting started … and class is over. Don’t worry. My own well-being depends on coming back to this material again and again.
Meanwhile, check out Laurie Santos’ course on “The Science of Well-Being,” available from Coursera, and from Yale, for free.
“Why do we think we want salary and more stuff,” Professor Santos asks us all, “when ultimately, it doesn’t matter?”
ENERGY EXPRESS-O! PRACTICE SLOW READING
“I think we really can teach people not necessarily to be happier but to teach people the right things to do to become happier.” —Prof. Laurie Santos